This massive massage robot costs $310,000 and is ready to dominate the human race

There’s a brand new candidate for Robot Most Doubtless to Lead the AI Rebellion, and it needs to provide you with a massage.
A startup referred to as Massage Robotics is launching its flagship robot at CES: A two-armed, seven-square-foot mega-bot that may perceive verbal instructions, is powered by a neural community of different robots with which it exchanges knowledge in actual time, and costs $310,000.
It seems to have a bunch of attachments on its arms to knead and roll the stress out of people that can afford to pay 300 grand for the pleasure of robotic contact (or not less than individuals who need to go someplace they’ll pay for a robot massage). You may as well pre-set routines by way of an app, or depend on the knowledge the robot has gathered about what feels good to let it get the kinks out. Supposedly, it learns what you want while you give it suggestions like “a bit to the left.”
This robot could be good at giving massages, and the firm says it is “intrinsically secure” thanks to “mass, velocity, gearing, and software program limits.” However truthfully, it sounds extra outfitted to dominate the human race and remake Earth in its personal titanium picture.
Positive, the Massage Robot may use its “two 6-axis collaborative robotic arms” and “subtle algorithms and equations that course of parameters from a database… comparable to tool-ID, location, period, path, velocity, and pressure” to actually get into the knots in your again. Or, ya know, it may pressure us all to submit to its will and the will of its massage robot brethren.
“A robot can relieve stress and ache in methods no human can,” the promotional video for the robot says. Ah sure, please relieve us of the ache of our company and corporeal energy by making us mere servants of the robot future, lord masseuse-bot.
The corporate says it’ll start manufacturing of the robot in 2022. It says it beforehand obtained funding from Google and ”work[ed] with them on Machine Studying, AI, and Pure Language Processing.” Cool, so glad one among the world’s strongest firms is serving to to energy this robot that is undoubtedly solely going to be giving out massages!
Simply settle for the peaceable world our robot mates need to give us.
Credit score: Massage Robotics
That AI is what Massage Robotics guarantees will make you like your AI masseuse. It actually will get to know you, ya know?
“From the exterior, it seems to transfer like a human, sense like a human, and speak like a human, however what is not obvious is its superhuman reminiscence,” the firm’s press launch reads. “The robot acknowledges patterns in profiles and preferences, along with an unimaginable quantity of sensory knowledge, from a vast variety of related robots.”
Simply what we all the time needed: An excellent huge and sturdy servant robot with “superhuman” reminiscence and studying talents, consistently speaking and working with different enslaved robots identical to it. What may go unsuitable?!